What meaning are you giving to the events and circumstances in your life?
We take what happens to us to be a fact. But for us to experience it we have to give it a meaning or tell a story about it.
Here is an example of an everyday situation.
We are meeting someone for coffee, but the person is late…..
Ok, he (she) will be here soon...….he could have let me know.... ...maybe he left his mobile at home... ..oh no maybe he's been in an accident...… or maybe he's totally forgotten about the coffee...…...
The reality is………. we are waiting for someone to arrive for a coffee. But we all try and make sense of what is happening by giving the event a meaning or telling a story about it.
We do this with small events like the one above but we also do this other situations and events in our lives.
We all feel at the mercy of the events and circumstances in our lives, but we always have a choice as to how we react by giving them different meanings.
It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters. Epictetus
If we.... lose a job or a relationship ends..... we can see it as a total disaster or as an opportunity to find something or someone better for us.
How we interpret the event and make sense of it, by giving it meaning, will determine how we feel about it.
We also do this at a deeper level, by giving meaning to our lives, which greatly influences how we behave and what we do.
Anybody at any time can choose to give a new meaning to any situation in their life or even to life itself.
This is probably the single most important thing that we can do if we want to change how we feel.